Open Letter: Life Ain’t All Fun and Games


Dear You,

For as much as I like fun…I’ve discovered that life ain’t all fun and games, a laugh a minute, or a bowl full of cherries.

That’s hard to take sometimes because I love love love fun things. I want to taste, feel, and experience all the world has to offer. I’m ready to go at a moments notice. I like good times, but don’t let my “happy-go-lucky” exterior fool you:  sometimes my insecure heart gets the best of me.

You ask, “How can that be? You have so many friends. You are the life of the party. Everyone secretly wants to be like you! Popular, fun, carefree”

Well, some days I am reminded that life ain’t all fun and games. I hate those days, those moments, when my insecurities flare with the intensity of a firecracker. You may not recognize my insecurities because they don’t keep me home. They don’t keep from seeking the company of people…lot’s of people. But, oh, they are there. Painfully present, yet hidden beneath my smile.

I love when people approve of what I do, how I think, how I handle situations, how I dress, how I express my creativity. But sometimes my flamboyant ways meet with the disapproving glare of raised eye-brows. Not everyone has the vision to appreciate the dreams in my head or the actions I take. Not everyone is ready to accept my overtures of friendship because I often extend it in the same bouncy manner as Tigger would if he were real. I get too excited too soon. Oh, how that hurts my heart.

People pleasing. I guess when you love people like I do, it is part of the territory. I want them to love and approve of me all the time. I’m usually OK, but sometimes it gets the better of me. Being a people pleaser causes me to succumb to peer-pressure. It was worse when I was young, like the teen years. I’m better now that I’m older, but sometimes I still get drawn into things I don’t really want to do. All because I cannot say NO. I hate disappointing anyone.

For years I planned and executed Christmas celebrations for my family. I do love planning and throwing a party, but expectations were high. The thought of disappointing ANYONE took the fun out of it for me. After all the holiday fanfare, when family members had returned to their own little corners of the world, there I sat amid the leftover tinsel, the dirty dishes, and discarded wrapping paper, knowing that they left disappointed. I know, I know, things like that say more about the dissatisfied party-goers than it does me, but it deeply cuts this people pleaser’s heart. I didn’t spend enough money. The limousine ride was “just OK.” It hurts when the love,  adoration, and approval are not there.

Oh well. I’ll be off on another adventure soon. I’ll throw a party for a group of people that will shower me with the adulation and  approval I so desperately crave. But sometimes, I just need to know that those closest to me love me despite my Tigger-ish ways, all my quirks, drama, and, often high-maintenance needs. Help me be happy even though life ain’t all fun and game.

Just love me!

Love Ya!! xoxox

The Sanguine

©2013 Shona Neff




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This entry was posted on Tuesday, October 15th, 2013 at 3:37 pm and is filed under Personalities: Four-Part Series, Personality Stories - Sanguine, The Personalities - Let's Learn!. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.


7 Responses to “Open Letter: Life Ain’t All Fun and Games”

  1. Nicole R. Bryan Says:

    Ha! I must really be this poor personality! Thanks for the post. I really enjoyed not only reading it but also the way that you set it up and went about explaining it. You are a blessing!

  2. admin Says:

    Thanks for stopping by Nicole! It is a different approach than I’ve used before, and I’m so glad to get some feedback that it works. More “open letters” to come. Thanks for blessing me today.


  3. Lisa Says:

    Hi Shona,
    Thanks for sharing all my secret compartments – Ms. Secret Agent Lady!!!
    Yes, we like to move onto the next adventure sometimes when we allow our
    feelings to take over and start thinking not everyone had the great time we
    had dreamed up. You are correct! We want to be happy, loved, adored, and seek
    approval. I was wondering about being a rule breaker with this personality? Not bad,
    just like a rebel in us!
    You bring great wisdom my friend and I thank you for your insightfulness! Hugs!

  4. admin Says:

    LOL…I’m just that good. Just kidding. I guess by sharing all your secrets just goes to show that there is something to personalities. And, even though this isn’t my primary personality my understanding helps me know the sanguines I enounter and that helps interactions go much smoother in most cases.

    Thanks for stopping by….and letting me expose you. lol


  5. admin Says:

    OH yeah…about rule breaking. Sanguine people certainly WILL push the rules especially if they think there is something FUN waiting for them.


  6. nascarccmgrlfan Says:

    I never been able to figure out whether I’m sanguine-choleric or choleric-sanguine. Maybe I’m 50/50. Should I think about which mode I’m in more or is it hard to see?

  7. admin Says:

    Sorry it took me so long to respond, but YES, since the san/choleric blend involves BOTH the extrovert personalities, it is very possible you are a 50/50 blend!! You nailed it!

    With this blend (and likewise with the phlegmatic/meancholy introvert blend) the setting you are in usually dictates which personality rises to the top. For example, I have a san/ch friend who speakes, writes, and used to organize/run conferences. When she is HIRED as a speaker at someone else’s event, her sanguine side emerges because all she has to do is show up, speak, and have fun. However, when she is IN CHARGE of an event and all the behind-the-scenes activity, her choleric takes over. That shows the 50/50 percentage of the blend you have.

    I hope that helps :)


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